A policeman treads on our hero's big toe as he rushes past towards crowd standing round the bar. Before he can say "ow" another police, with very large feet, storms pass, stamping on the whole of his Churlish's foot. "OW!"
"You are under arrest pal, for interferring with a policeman in the course of his duty. And uttering an abusive remark."
Our intrepid PI is tempted to answer back, but notices most of the other customers in the pub were being led away, stuggling, in handcuffs.
"What's your name?" the policeman with the biggest feet asked.
Once Churlish was installed in the back of a police van, everything became a little more relaxed. Everyone else in the van seem to be police. "We have to arrest a quota of Domestic Extremists every night to keep the Devil Worshippers happy, ha ha.," explained the big-footed one. "It's called racial prejudice if we look up too many dagos."
"I was just an Innocent Bystander" Churlish tries to explain. "Can't we come to some arrangement?" His aunt had recently left him four solid silvr candlestick in her will.
"Want some of this?" The policeman offers a spliff. "What we want is you drug connectiions. We haven't done a drug raid for ages. What's that stuff you want to try Kev? SLP? or Slut? Can you get us any, fast?"
"I am not a drug dealer!"
"Mr Churlish, it doesn't pay to be coy with me. Your name comes up on the police computer."
"I expect that my brother, Geoffrey. I haven't seen him for years."
"No family values, eh? We could do you for that, and all!"
"Nice one, Brian!" The van fills with raucous laughter. Tonight the filth are having a great time.
